Drifting
by VisualIDentificationZeta
Summary: Harm/Mac UST, Harm/Other RST, Mac/Brumby RST... SUMMARY: after getting another chance at life, Harm knows he must talk to the woman he loves before she marries another man and he loses her forever. Rewrite of ADRIFT 2.


TITLE: Drifting

AUTHOR: Vid Z.

PAIRING: Harm/Mac UST, Harm/Other RST, Mac/Brumby RST, Other/Other RST

TIMELINE: takes place during Adrift 2

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc of the TV show JAG are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fic. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: didn't see this exact scene, so I'm basing what I know of the episode and on partial transcripts on the net. Last saw this ep, oh about 8 years ago... Anyway, they are alone in Harm's hospital room when they have this talk.

SUMMARY: after getting another chance at life, Harm knows he must talk to the woman he loves before she marries another man and he loses her forever.

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"So I heard you jumped my bones in sick bay." the cocky grin on Harm's lips was a shadow of his previous ones. Exhaustion, pneumonia, hypothermia and near-death can take a lot out of a guy.

She flushed "Rumor."

"You know, I wouldn't have been opposed to that." Elizabeth flushed even deeper "I would just want to be fully coherent when you do it so I can fully appreciate and enjoy it."

She started spluttering as Harm watched her, amused as all hell.

Harm's features grew solemn then "Anyway, seriously, I want to thank you for what you did. You saved my life." Beth composed herself and watched Harm as he looked down at his hands. "And all I did was almost take yours." he finished in a whisper, loathing and hate at himself clear in his voice.

Her heart aching, she realized Harm was yet again taking the blame that was not his to shoulder. Not knowing how to get through to him in any other way she reached out and took his hand.

Harm was staring at his weak hands, hating himself for having almost killed her, for almost having killed a second RIO, this one more important, when a small soft hand entered his view. With a bated breath he watched as this small, yet strong hand of a small, yet strong woman, took hold of his, instantly enveloping it in a glove of warmth. Heat immediately lunged from that point and spread like lightning, finally warming his chilled body.

Silently, they enjoyed the company and the fact they were still alive for almost an hour.

Finally, having screwed up the courage Harm raised his eyes "You know, what you said about getting another chance and what's really important?"

"Yes?" she didn't know why, but her gut instinct was telling her the next few minutes would be crucial for the direction her life would take.

"When I wasn't fighting the waves and had a few seconds of rest I thought about those words and I realized something."

"Go on." she prodded him gently, curious where this was going.

"I don't love Mac." he blurted out finally "I had feelings for the woman she was before I left for flight duty, but during the time I was gone she'd turned into someone I can't recognize. Or even like. She's become mean, cold-hearted, manipulative, petty and vengeful. She's been flashing that ring in front of me for a year and a half and if she truly felt anything for me, she wouldn't be marrying another man. And she wouldn't be demanding I was there to see it happen. So, I don't see any future for me with her."

"Oh." Beth couldn't find anything better to say, Harm's confession having been the last thing she'd expected to hear, but for some reason she felt relieved.

Yet Harm wasn't finished yet.

"When I was drowning, your face was the one on my mind. I hated myself because you may have been dying right then and it was all my fault. I couldn't even think of the possibility that you were already dead, it was too painful."

Squeezing his hand she tried to get his attention "Harm... It's okay, it wasn't your fault, you couldn't have known that the storm would change direction and that all the avionics would fail." But Harm wasn't hearing her, too far gone to do anything but babble himself out.

"And the only thing I could think about was that I was too late. Too late realizing this and too late doing something about it, even if we hadn't had to eject."

"Harm..." she tried to interrupt him, having a feeling what he was getting at and not really sure he was ready to say it and for the repercussions of it being revealed.

"No, Skates, please let me say this." it was the look in his eyes that silenced her, not the words. Wordlessly she nodded. When he was sure she was listening he took a deep breath and prepared to expose himself fully for the first time since Diane.

"What I'm trying to tell you is that I realized I haven't loved Mac in a long time." he squinted out of the corner of his eyes to see her reaction. Yet, her stoic expression gave nothing away. "I haven't loved her in a long time, partly because I've been in love with you."

There, he'd said it. Now, for damage control and trying to salvage what he could of their friendship. He wasn't sorry he'd said it, because he couldn't stand the thought of dying without her ever knowing the truth about his feelings, but he was sorry for what it would do to their friendship and flying together.

"I'm sorry I'm telling you this only now, now that's too late, that you're getting married, but it's something I had to get off my chest. I don't expect anything and I'm not trying to break you and... whatshisname... up, but I just wanted... no.... _needed_ you to know. I know you don't feel the same for me, I just needed you to know in case anything happened to me, I can't bear the thought of dying with you never knowing. That's all. I'm sorry."

Beth couldn't say anything for several minutes, so shocked was she by Harm's revelation, it had been nothing she'd anticipated when she'd come into his room such a short time ago. How your entire life can change so quickly...

She opened and closed her mouth several times, not knowing what to say. Finally, remembering Harm trusted action more than words, she did what her heart was telling her to do.

Harm watched her pull her hands away with trepidation that worsened when he saw her move closer. Closing his eyes he waited for the slap he knew would be coming, the slap he knew he deserved. He was such a bastard, doing this to her now, now that she'd finally found happiness with some other man. Saying these things to her even though he knew she didn't feel the same. Even though she...

She was kissing him...

She was _kissing _him?!

Harm's eyes snapped open to see his lips weren't lying to him, Beth's face was impossibly close, her eyes closed as she tried to convey her message.

Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkes was truly kissing him so passionately and full of feelings as if he'd just given her the moon and the stars and promised to be hers until the end of time. He gasped and Beth exploited the opportunity and slipped her tongue into his mouth, engaging in a battle with his. Harm slowly wrapped his arms around her body, his exhausted muscles burning, and pulled her to him, devouring her, tasting the exquisite taste that was Elizabeth with a side order of tears.

When they ran out of breath Beth broke the kiss, but continued to peck him on his lips, laughing and crying at the same time.

"You idiot." she murmured against his lips when she finally regained the brain power to even speak "You stupid, adorable, lovable idiot. _My _idiot. How can you not know that I love you too? Do you think I would volunteer to naked try to warm up just any man?"

"Naked?" Harm stuttered.

"Direct skin to skin contact gives the best results, you know that. Cloth just gets in the way by acting as isolation. When we were left alone I undressed us both and slipped under the covers with you to warm you up."

Since he wasn't in the condition to do anything about the rush of hormones the idea of her getting naked and pressing her naked womanly body against his equally naked body, he decided to redirect the conversation back to the important matters. "You love me?"

"Yes, I do."

He squinted at her warily "What about whatshisname?"

She sighed, ashamed of herself "I lied."

Harm gasped in disbelief "You lied?"

Her dark eyes lowered in guilt "I thought you didn't love me and because of that I didn't want to let on that I love you, not wanting to end up looking foolish, pining for a taken man, so I made it up."

"Oh." Harm nodded to himself "I can understand that. But the important thing now is that we're finally together."

Beth leaned back in the visitor chair and took his hands again "Yes, we are."

She settled in for a long sitting session when Harm's voice broke the silence.

"I think I'm getting hypothermia." Harm grinned and Beth couldn't help but laugh out loud at that. "I think you should warm me up a little."

"Oh, Harm." she murmured exasperatedly, but still followed his directions and climbed onto the bed with him, curling into his side, her head resting on his shoulder and his hand on the curvature of her hip.

Her memory went back to those terrifying minutes on the Patrick Henry and her lips curved at one part in particular.

"You know, when we got you to the sickbay, you asked me if we dated."

"I did?" Harm murmured and looked down at Beth.

"Yeah, you did."

"And, what did you say?"

"What do you think?" he enjoyed the soothing way her finger drew lines on his chest.

"And what would you say if I asked you now?" the smile in his voice was obvious and she couldn't stop the smile that took over her own lips.

Beth looked up, her eyes shining brightly.

"Hell yeah."

Then she took his lips in a passionate kiss.

Neither of them had to ask someone else that question ever again.

THE END

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